This chapter was written in collaboration with Scylla.
“They are really not your friends?” Scylla put her hands down on the bed. “What makes a friend to you, Amon? Do they have to live up to an impossible standard? Or are you just too afraid to simply admit that you are close to them.”
The woman closed her eyes. “Sometimes I have to remember that about you. You know, I shouldn’t get angry at the way you bluster, because you are simply trying to push people away… maybe because you don’t want to feel the pain of losing them again.”
The white mage looked away. “That is something I can understand.”
“Or maybe I just know that I’m bad news for anyone I get involved with,” he grumbled. “This was never supposed to be a long-term situation. If what you want me to say is that I care about these people, then aye. I care about them enough not to expose them to all this Allagan nonsense.”
Amon threw his hands up.
“What do you think they’ll feel knowing this? If they care at all about me, which I… do not know their hearts… then ‘twould only put worry and strife they don’t need to carry to know my illness. Not that long ago, I didn’t exist to them. Why should it matter for them to know that I may not exist to them again, very soon?”
“Because just maybe they deserve to know what is happening with you… they are the only family that you have left.” Scylla frowned at Amon. “To think that you are just a fleeting memory to those who care about you… that is to dishonor their hearts. My father remembered you to the day of his death.”
The white mage bit her lip, wiping the sides of her eyes quick.
“I’ll not break my oath as a healer and tell them… You have time to think about this. It is up to you to tell them the truth.”
He took note that she did not include herself in that statement of people who cared about him. Not that he blamed her.
Scylla was trying very hard to be business-like in her dealings with him, he could tell. But at the mention of her late father, she couldn’t help but show a hint of emotion.
“I… have a lot to think about,” Amon finally said.
He didn’t know how he felt at the moment, dealing with the news, or if he could deal with the feelings of others at this point.
“I’m not sure what to do about myself, much less them… but I can’t waste time twiddling my thumbs. That much is for sure.”
He grit his teeth.
“If only I had access to the Tower… my lab… everything I need, I could build from there…”
The Elezen propped his head against his palm.
“Where can I get such materials for such a delicate procedure here?”
What a rotten situation.
“I don’t know. Ben has some thoughts of where to start.” Scylla sighed, looking towards the outside into the hall. “I’ve never tried anything this big… or complex even in Allag… but…”
The white mage paused for a moment, before taking his hand. “Amon, you may have done some terrible, terrible things…” She closed her eyes once more.
“But no, I don’t want you to die.”
With that, she left Amon alone to think.